 The magazine of the Melbourne PC User Group PC 88 in Sydney Tom Coleman |
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That we should go to Sydney and run a stand at PC88 seemed to be a fair enough proposition when it started out. We had visions of spreading the Goodnews amongst the great unwashed.
We would send a bevy of missionaries to convert the heathen Sydneysiders and lead them to the PATH\ light\truth\beauty.
Our stand at PC88 was to introduce the social edge of technology to the savages.
Well that was what we thought. Imagine our surprise when we discovered that they even have running water in Sydney. What was more we learned that computer users in Sydney had deciphered the meaning of "For %F IN (*.*) DO DEL C: %F".
This was humiliating, particularly as we first thought they were using smoke signals to transmit it.
It was when we arrived at the Darling Harbour Convention Centre that the awful truth was driven home. Here was Brian Graham and Paul Zucker (That's the Paul Zucker who is defending 'Look and Feel' action by the makers of the Zuckerboard.) and neither of them had two heads.
We unobtrusively hid our boxes of beads and other trade goods and sat down to negotiate an agreement based on equality. The first issue was Land Rights. Clearly we were going to have to make concessions and share part of our 3 metre stand with them.
Over the next short while it became distressingly obvious that we had nothing that they wanted or would even like. They are at least at home with computing as we are.
Finally we had only two options open to us..
Should we use the white man's scourge, alcohol, to destroy their minds and self respect or should we be nice to them.
Well about that time Brian Graham was extolling the virtues of Pizzaz and I needed to pick his brains while he was sober so we elected to be nice.
So the show rolled along in a spirit of Glasnost and Detente. It was a great experience. We got along just fine except for the occasional hiccup like:
- ....... The electricity flows upside-down in Melbourne"
- "Melbourne computers are not better built. They just don't have any cooling problems."
- Our man at the show was boasting that "Melb PC has 2500 members. Each meeting has 500 members attending." "Really!" said the impressed listener "What is wrong with your meetings that 2000 of your members don't go."
- There was a slogan "Blessed are the pessimists for they have made backups." Makes you think does it not?
- So did the query "How is it that all hard disks regardless of size are always almost full."
- Then there was the user who admitted that " .... After owning a computer for three months I became so demoralized and confused that I put my head in the electric oven."
- We heard of a salesman who said "I would not advise you to buy that product. It would be a waste of your money. I don't sell it."
- It appears that one user purchased an evaluation shareware disk from a commercial Public Domain retailer for $15. It worked ok but was not satisfactory. After failing to gain any sympathy from the retailer they wrote to the author in the U.S.A.; demanding their $15 refund. They wanted us to make further representations on their behalf. No, they were not prepared to join a User Group.
All in all the Sydney show was a successful effort which enrolled 63 new members.
It was a learning experience too that has sharpened our claws for the Melbourne show early in June. When that comes around we are going to need the assistance of those members who can spare the time to man the stand and support our group.
If you would like to be part of our effort at PC88 you don't have to be an expert at anything. The only thing you need is to be an interested member. It is your interest and enthusiasm that will show what kind of people we are and why you like Melb PC User Group. That's what we want to tell the world.
You do not have to be a salesman. We are not selling anything. We are offering the most sincere service there is. We are offering ourselves. If you like Melb PC User Group then you are the kind of person we need to man the stand.
Reprinted from the May 1988 issue of PC Update, the magazine of Melbourne PC User Group, Australia
